A Case for New Year Resolutions

I’m going to lose 15 pounds this year! I’m going to read 15 books this year! I’m going to stop smoking or start running or stop eating donuts or start eating whole wheat bran muffins! I’m going to stop yelling so much at the kids (or my spouse, or the neighbor, or my mom, or the dog)! I’m going to get a job or quit my job or advance within my job or go back to school so I can get my dream job or turn my current hobby into a job! I’m going to stop this or start that or change these or develop those!

And so it goes every year. And while we instinctively associate New Years with New Year resolutions, less than half of all Americans make any. Less than half of those (so only a quarter of the US population!) are still pursuing those goals just 6 months into the New Year!

I think the phrase “New Year Resolutions” has lost its meaning from overuse and under achievement. To resolve to do something, after all, means I am determined to carry out and follow through, to see something through, enduring to the end, and see it accomplished come hell or high water! And yet more of us than not “resolve” only to see our resolutions through to the midway point, enduring merely to the middle.

But studies show we benefit from setting goals, even when we consistently fail to reach those goals.

What?! Now wait a minute, you might be thinking. I’m a reasonably intelligent person. So how could New Year resolutions help even if I fail to reach a single, solitary resolution ever set at any time in my entire life? Literally!

Here is how you might look at it: If you aim no higher than your ankles and actually reach so minimal a goal, you won’t have achieved much of anything. You never really had to exert yourself much to jump very high. As a matter of fact, you can achieve that goal while sitting down, watching TV!

But if you aim at the sun and your jump falls short, you still may find yourself on the moon – quite a bit higher (better, thinner, healthier, nicer, etc.) than if you never bothered jumping. Even if you only find yourself up in the trees – a far cry from any sort of celestial achievement –  you’ll still be in a higher place than if you kept your feet firmly planted on earthly sod (or propped up on the coffee table watching TV).

So, what makes a goal a goal and differentiates it from a wish or something we merely hope one day to happen to us?

Wishful thinking is a passive, day dreaming sort of activity that fails to inspire action, much less sustained effort.

A goal is written, expressed, specific, and has benchmarks, usually specified dates by which a part or the whole of the goal will be attained. There is accountability written into the very process of pursuing the goal, if not to someone in authority over you, then to yourself or to God. Goal setting requires something of the person prior to the goal being set. It requires thought, consideration, self-examination, an accounting of what I want and an analysis of how I can get it, and the steps needed to attain the desired end.

Wishing is easy. Goal setting can be somewhat arduous. Wishing is flimsy and soft and marshmallowy. Goals require discipline and determination and follow-through.

No wonder we so often fall short of our goals. But also, no wonder we do so much better when we set them even though we usually fall far short of those achievements. Research suggests those who set specific goals, write them down, and work toward them are 10 times more likely to attain them than those who are vaguer in their desires.

Remember, only landing on the moon when aiming at the sun is no failure. Celebrate the level of achievement you reach despite not reaching as high as you planned.

So you lose 5 pounds instead of 15. But you lost 5 pounds more than if you never resolved to lose 15. So you read 7 books, failing to reach your goal, but read 4 more than last year and 6 ½ more than the year before that! So you don’t entirely quit smoking, but cutting what was smoked last year by half is no small feat!

Besides, the stretch that was necessary to reach wherever we get, even if failing to go the distance, changes us. We become someone slightly different, a slightly improved version of our former selves by virtue of the effort extended as we try to reach our New Year resolutions. Goals challenge us, cause us to become someone better than we were before reaching and stretching. And that also is no small matter. Think about it: Will you be worse off if you fail to reach a goal you set than if you never reached for it in the first place? But what if you become a little better, a little healthier? What if in the process of failing to meet your goals, you get closer to them than if you never try?

So make New Year resolutions. Set goals. Read books and blogs and articles about how to most effectively reach those goals. And begin the process of stretching your physical, moral, spiritual and/or intellectual muscles! The stretch will hurt so good!

But remember: You can’t run faster than you can. If you have never run further than the distance from your couch to the fridge, don’t start with a marathon. Progress requires sustained effort over time, not one sudden leap forward. Pounds are lost (or gained) one at a time. So be patient as you learn to conquer your demons, overcome your weaknesses, and climb life’s mountains, one step, one pound, one day, and one bite at a time. And let me know how you do along the way!